Today’s 5 things: Unthinkable. Unending. Unbelievable

An unthinkable crime. An unending campaign. An unbelievable finish. It’s Monday, and here are the five things you need to know to Get Up to Speed and Out the Door.

KALAMAZOO SHOOTING

Qs & (not many) As:  Words like “shock” and “unimaginable” don’t quite do the job in describing the reaction to what happened Saturday evening in this Michigan city. Here’s another difficult word: why. Why would a man shoot and kill six people, seemingly at random, all while picking up and dropping off passengers for Uber? Maybe we’ll get to the why today, when suspect Jason Brian Dalton is arraigned. Here’s the latest on what we know and don’t know.

CAMPAIGN 2016

Had something better to do this weekend than watch the latest episode of that crazy reality show known as the presidential primaries? Well let us catch you up:

Luck be a lady tonight: Hillary beats the house (and Bernie) in the Nevada caucuses, once again earning her top billing on the Democratic side.

Nothing’s gonna stop us now: The Donald, this season’s breakout star, kicks you-know-what in the South Carolina GOP primary. He says he’s going to win the GOP nomination and predicts record turnout in an epic season finale with Hillary. 

Bushwhacked: Longtime cast member Jeb! leaves the show, after yet another disappointing finish. The audience just never warmed up to him.

Can Bernie rebound in South Carolina? How long before the good Dr. Ben leaves the show? Will Melania get another speaking role?  Stay tuned.

SAN BERNARDINO SHOOTING

Have fingers. Will point: The feds really want to get into San Bernardino shooter Syed Farook’s iPhone. But they may be out of luck — and not because Apple is fighting a court order to unlock the phone. The FBI says a county employee may have accidentally reset the phone’s iCloud password. The county says, the FBI told us too. Either way, goodbye iCloud backup, which could have revealed more info about Farook.

SYRIA CIVIL WAR

ISIS. Always ISIS: World leaders announce an imminent partial truce in war-ravaged Syria. So what does ISIS do hours later? It hits Syrian regime strongholds in Homs and Damascus with car bombs and suicide attacks, killing well over 100 people yesterday. U.S. Secretary of State John Kerry still believes a ceasefire is possible. But we’re a week-and-change into the promised timeline and … crickets. 

INDIA WATER CRISIS

Cut off:  Ever try to fix one problem and only end up creating another? That’s pretty much what’s happening in India. after deadly protests and a water crisis broke out over quotas involving its complex caste system. The quota system’s meant to correct inequalities created by the caste structure. But in Harayana state, the relatively prosperous Jat group is crying ‘Reverse discrimination,’ Members blocked roads and attacked railways. Oh, and they’ve also cut off water to New Delhi. Now do they have your attention?

In other news

The death toll from Fiji’s devastating cyclone keeps going up … David Cameron says Britain will stay with EU (but London’s mayor says, Not if I can help it) … The Pope says cool it with the death penalty.

BREAKFAST BROWSE

People are talking about these. Read up. Join in.

Quote of the day:

“80 percent of my income goes to paying my rent. Isn’t that ironic? Your employee for your food delivery app … can’t afford to buy food.”

Yelp employee Talia Jane, who wrote an open letter to Yelp’s CEO complaining her pay’s too low and the rent’s too damn high. She was promptly fired.

Baby, you can’t drive my car

Welcome to Lamu, the Kenyan island where cars are banned.

Money shot

50 Cent may be broke, but he still has some cash left to flash. His bankruptcy judge may have more than 21 questions about that.

Lunar jamz

NASA finally releases the “outer-space type music” from an Apollo mission on the far side of the moon.

Won by that much

Races don’t end any closer than Denny Hamlin’s 0.011-second victory in the Daytona 500 yesterday.

Getting down

What do you do when you’re 106 years old and meet the President you’ve waited a lifetime for? You bust a move, of course

WHAT’S FOR LUNCH

Here’s what’s happening today.

No laughing matter

Her husband’s lawyers’ are fighting it, but Camille Cosby will be deposed this morning by attorneys for the eight women who’ve sued comedian Bill Cosby for defamation.

Klan clash

The KKK wants a piece of Georiga’s “Adopt-A-Highway” action. The state DOT says Nuh uh. Georgia’s highest court says, Hmm, let us decide.

Michigan shooting rampage: What we know and don't know
Michigan shooting spree: What we know and don't know

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